Mega Man Maverick Hunter X

   You walk around with a freaking cannon on your arm. Your best friend has a lightsaber AND a cannon. And you can light people on fire with your hand. I honestly cannot think of what I would rather do on a Friday morning while drinking my tea in bed and watching Miley Cyrus on the today show. Shit, I shouldn’t have said that. Honest, I didn’t know she was on, I, I, just,- I WAS ONLY WATCHING THE FIRST FIVE! THE GAME’S HARD AND I CAN’T DRINK MY TEA WHILE PLAYING! LAY OFF DAMNIT!

                                                                 VERDICT:

                                                                    9/10  EDITOR’S CHOICE

Jirbo Break Review

  It is free and it is better than that stupid Apple iPod application. And it is addictive. I beat all 15 levels. You try suckers.

                                                                                          VERDICT:

                                                                                              7.5/10

Tap Tap Revenge Review

  It is a free game for the iPhone. There is some neat music. Kinda? This is way to easy. I played on EXTREME (hardest) first time and broke preset records. Ouch. But it is free…

 

                                                                    VERDICT:

                                                                            6.9/10

iPhone 3G Review

   I think I have reviewed hardware before? Or not? Anyways, this phone is amazing, i.e. I can update this blog with my new personal best friend.

   The phone checks e-mail, and well, it does some amazing things. Lemme break it down for you

      -Lightsaber Application (swing your phone and accelerometer picks up movements and makes noise)

     -Stapler Application (Staple thin air. As amazing as it sounds.)

      -Cowbell Application (hit your screen to play the ultimate insturment)

      -THE ENTIRE BIBLE ON YOUR PHONE! SEE, GOD DID GIFT US THIS PHONE!!!

 

                                                                       VERDICT:

                                                                          9.9/10

                                                                                          EDITOR’S CHOICE

P.S.-It doesn’t get a perfect because of SMALL MINOR MINSCULE MICRO glitches.

The Dark Knight or Amazing Kickass Movie Review

  Wow. Just wow. This is amazing. Heath Ledger creeps you out, Christopher Nolan directs beautifully, and you get to watch a super hero movie that was made by actual comic book geeks like us. How gratifying. This is the best comic book movie ever. Go see it now.

                                                                               VERDICT:

                                                                                  10/10 EDITOR’S CHOICE

Mamma Mia! Review

  All of you laughing can choke on your fritos, bastards. i saw it, get over it. At least I have the balls to admit it. AND I LIKED IT! EAT IT!

   It was funny, and the de-sugarized (it’s a word now!) some of the ABBA songs so they didn’t sound like something you play at a standardized white trash wedding at your local trailer park. (And Pierce Brosnan can sing! First he is James Bond, then an Artist, now he just needs to write a novel better than Ulysses and he will be Super-Irishman! Man, he kicks ass….)

   This is the type of movie that will be even better on a home blu-ray player. You could tell by the sound and vid quality they filmed it with good equipment.

 

                                                                          VERDICT:

                                                                               8.0/10

Trauma Center Under the Knife 2 Review

  This is what you call an amazing game. I think we Northern Americans have been eating a can of whoop-ass that was made in Japana all year now. First they do Persona 3 FES, then MGS4, and now TC: UTK2. Shit, we American developers are screwed. (Especially when you consider the fact that our only possible salvation at this point is Gears of War II or Call of Duty 5. And here is the problem: Treyarch, the dipshits who brought you “Spiderman: The Movie: The Game” (real title I believe?) are developing COD5, and Epic, developers of Gears is claiming to have developed the most amazing game ever by taking N64 gameplay and using hi-def graphics and 3RD person camera angles.)

   Anyways, most of you have probably never heard of this game, just like none of you ever heard of Guitar Hero, which I was ranting and raving about, and then they made a commericial and you asked me if I heard about it. Anywho, this is a true arthouse or independent game. The store I went to got ten copies and that will probably be it forever. And it was a popular store. Anyways. The game is amazing. It is very challenging and the game’s art channels anime and manga and as a self-proclaimed anime otaku I can say it comes pretty damn close to an anime feature film or miniseries. The story is a blast, and the game is LONG. This is over 10 hours and it is on the DS. That is huge. This is the first time in my life (other then Ghost Babel) where I have actually been amazed by a portable title. Buy this.

                                      VERDICT:

                                         10/10    EDITOR’S CHOICE